Get to

November 14, 2015

Rarely before has my family felt the truth behind the phrase “If Mama ain’t happy, ain’t nobody happy” than we have the past few weeks.

First, I got a nasty cold. Then, while I was still recovering I got yet another migraine, in a long string of migraines over the past few months. Then, just as I was finally recovering from both of those, I got either food poisoning or the worst stomach flu of my life.

For the first time since I can remember, I literally could not get out of bed. Even after the initial flu symptoms ceased, I was still so exhausted I had to sleep until noon, and only got up after forcibly pulling myself from bed.

In the midst of all this, life kept happening.

My husband was working long, arduous hours in the cold, coming home exhausted and soaked to the bone.

I felt terrible, but I had to dump my usual mom workload on him as soon as he walked in the door.

The nine-year-old had to prepare for his first big school project. He was nervous and wanted everything to be just right. I had to help him make a chimpanzee costume. I had to help him study and rehearse.

The three-year-old got yet another ear infection. We had to buy more antibiotic drops to treat him.

I have to see a specialist next week to try to get to the bottom of these migraines that are really cramping my style.

Because I live in the middle of nowhere, I have to take off work and drive for two hours to the specialist’s office.

I was beginning to wonder, “Why me?”

Then an article about the Syrian refugees caught my eye while scanning the headlines online. As I read the article, I began to feel so ashamed.

Do Syrian refugee mothers get migraines?

Do Syrian refugee children get ear infections?

What sort of medical care do they receive?

Do Syrian refugee parents have jobs?

Do Syrian refugee children get to go to school?

I decided that I was overusing the phrase “had to.”

I made a list of all the things I “had to” do over the past few weeks. After it was finished, I replaced the phrase “had to” with “got to.”

The results are remarkable:

Even after the initial flu symptoms ceased, I was still so exhausted I GOT to sleep until noon.

I GOT to dump my usual mom workload on my husband as soon as he walked in the door.

The nine-year-old had to prepare for a big school project. I GOT to help him make a chimpanzee costume. I GOT to help him study and rehearse.

The three-year-old got yet another ear infection. We GOT to buy more antibiotic drops to treat him.

I GET to see a specialist next week to try to get to the bottom of these migraines.

Because I live in a safe, beautiful place; because I have a flexible job and an understanding boss; because we have great health insurance; because I have a safe, reliable car; because I don’t live in a war zone I GET to take off work and drive for two hours to the specialist’s office.

What a difference a word makes to change your whole attitude.

This article first appeared in the Lewistown News-Argus and the Sidney (Mont.) Herald on November 14, 2015.